Tired

Healing is exhausting.

No one really tells you this, but recovering from an abusive relationship of any kind is exhausting. Just because you are doing something you know is better for you, doesn't mean it's easy. I have never felt more exhausted in my whole life, including when my son was a newborn and my husband and I were up every 2-3 hours to feed our son and rock him back to sleep.

After I went no contact with my mother, I remember telling my therapist that I felt like I had to detox from the chaos I was living in my whole life. You can only start to heal when your brain perceives that you are finally safe, emotionally and physically. For some of us it might be the first time EVER. If your nervous system and your body have been in survival mode for that long, when you finally feel safe enough to heal it can be so incredibly draining. This doesn't mean you're doing it wrong, actually it's quite the opposite. This change and healing happens in small shifts, but it just happens. I have done and thought things in a way I never would have two years ago. Progress over perfection, the more you say it, the more your brain will actually believe it.

Progress over perfection.

Progress over perfection....